Looking Beyond the Mirror

“Oh roses for the flush of youth,
And laurel for the perfect prime;
But pluck an ivy branch for me
Grown old before my time.”

Christina Rossetti
“Song”

The saying, “old before one’s time,” has become a cliché that many people take for granted today. However, we see the relevance of its message everyday. What does “growing old before one’s time” really mean? I believe it can mean many things, but in all cases, it is the failure to live one’s life with purpose, goals, and happiness. I have seen many people who lack a sense of confidence in themselves. They may feel insecure about their appearance, their intelligence, or their ability to relate to others. Sadly, all of these insecurities often lead people to lock themselves away from the world that they fear in an attempt to shelter themselves from the sorrow that they think has been caused by a loss of youth and youthful accomplishments. How many times have we heard, “If I was young again…” or “When I was in my prime…”

We grow old when we sorrow for things that we can never change. The “what if,” the “maybe,” and the “should have” keep us from moving forward in life. Many people have the mistaken idea that if they stand still, no harm will come to them, but in standing still, people grow old without experiencing a life really lived. People may see youth as beauty or as past accomplishments during adolescence, but growing old in this sense has nothing to do with chronological age and everything to do with state of mind and pursuing goodness and happiness for ourselves and others no matter what the age.

I have seen individuals in their seventies who were beautiful people in their prime, and I have also seen people in their twenties shriveled in bitterness and lack of purpose. There is nothing wrong with feeling pride in the accomplishments gained in youth, but as we grow older that does not mean that the accomplishments should end there. American society is dominated by the idea that youthful appearance is essential for happiness. People spend millions of dollars each year to keep their appearance looking “young.” However, this obsession with a youthful appearance often makes individuals neglect youth in mind and spirit. They may hate their job, their relationships, or feel insecure about their abilities, yet it is the physical youth that they continue to seek and try to regain. They do not realize that the most fulfilling form of youth is found in stable relationships, goals, and purposes that can only be found by stepping out of one’s comfort zone. It may be easier to spend money on the face lift rather than work on deeply rooted insecurities, but true youth is found in a security gained by breaking out of one’s shell and by looking beyond the mirror for a definition of satisfied youth.

What do you think defines youth and how is it retained?

--Carrie Goertz